Oh the Labels We'll Grow! Changing the Way You-and Others-See You. New blog post: http://ow.ly/1YgR0 Share

Do you ask yourself, "Will I?" If so, you increase your own motivation for a task. http://ow.ly/1U4EJ Share

Are you moving forward the way you'd like? If not, watch for these 6 pitfalls: http://ow.ly/1TDaV Share

6 Simple habits to help you live longer: http://ow.ly/1Tx7h Share

Did you think we were just fidgety? Moving helps us memorize! http://ow.ly/1NBmJ Share

New blog post: Taming the Thought Tornado ADHD http://ping.fm/QakNQ Share

Who are your lifelines? Have you thanked them today? Food for thought. Share

NEW BLOG POST: The Deluge: Casting Off Greed and Meeting Real Needs http://ping.fm/FcqrV Share

THE DELUGE: Casting Off Greed and Meeting Real Needs

If you’re from anywhere near Nashville , Tennessee , you might now feel the urge to scream at the sight or sound of the word “flood.” I know; I do. But hand in hand with that urge to vent all one’s angst is a ceaseless fascination with anything related to the Great Flood of 2010. Again, I can bear witness to that. The real carrier of Nashville Flood news is now social media, and I can hardly peel my eyes from it these last seven days.

I’ve no intention of creating yet another written account of the storm, the flood, the aftermath, or even the swarm of loving, giving people overtaking our communities to help in the rescue and restoration efforts. So if you’re looking for such details, skip on over to YouTube or FaceBook, as I’ve something else on my mind. Besides, I was not caught in the epicenter of the devastation, and am in no position to be a representative voice for the victims of this city’s worst disaster on record since the Civil War.

As much as last weekend’s deluge swamped my yard and basement, another deluge has swamped my soul. At first, it was the thumping, ceaseless rain throughout last weekend that muffled my joy and dampened my spirits. Next, news of devastation affecting neighbors, friends, and historically important places entered my psyche like polluted mud seeping in to cloud my perspective and enshroud any feeling of hope. But in these last few days, as the indomitable power of the human spirit has been on display for all to see, I turn a critical eye toward my own usually indefatigable spirit. Why so blue, I’m thinking, when my family and I were spared our home, our lives? The sun has returned full force, my yard is lush and green, and I feel like a shriveling lily.

It was the window that did it. Strolling across Vanderbilt’s medical campus Friday afternoon to visit a patient, I caught sight of my rather puffy outline in the café window. Wowww, I thought, that’s not the figure I’m used to seeing. I’m clearly not starving! And it hit me. I’ve been hoarding. In so many ways. While seemingly every person in Nashville is abuzz with items to give to the flood victims, from clothes, to household goods, to food and bottled water, I’m struck by how much I’ve taken in that I haven’t needed. And I’m deluged with myriad thoughts in flashes, from how much I’ve been spending in groceries, to how often I overeat, to shoes I never needed, to the box of linens I haven’t used in years that I failed to bring to the flood swap at work today. In the flood of stories of voluntarism saving Nashville from the devastation, I realize how much I have to give, and in contrast, how I've been hoarding.

I’m overcome with my own greed. Next to me on my desk sit two pieces of pizza from a group lunch. “I’ll take them home for dinner,” I tell myself, before remembering that I have an entire pizza leftover in the fridge from the other night. My compulsion to keep things from going to waste has gone to my waist, for certain. Long gone are the days when my kids and I had not quite enough to eat, so why do I still live in the collecting mode? Like our grandparents still saving every little thread in the aftermath of the World War, I’ve been hoarding. Maybe out of fear, maybe out of habit. But I can find nothing good in this lifestyle. I’ve even begun to conserve my physical energy (i.e. not exercise) in case I might need it later. This makes me tired. Lethergic. Lazy. Overweight.

I hoard money. Not that I make much, mind you, but I’m stingy even with my own children. Shame on me. Saving for a rainy day? I wish I could say so. After years of marriage to an extremely controlling man, I learned to love the freedom of having my own fist around the dollars. My Christian faith tells me that giving a tenth of my income to others in need is the only way to live. Perhaps my ignoring this way of life is why I’ve been in sort of a holding pattern for the last several years.

And what about my time? Ok, so I’ve finally signed up with Hands On Nashville for a couple service gigs. Yay me. But it is high time I began to give away my time and energy on a regular basis. I no longer work two jobs. It took me forty years, but I finally learned the art of relaxing and taking care of myself, so I can’t say I’m in a needed “restful phase” of midlife. I certainly needed this last year of recovery and recuperation. But by now I’ve gone too far, and serve my own greed far more than the needs of others. Things are out of kilter, and I’m dying to turn them around.

So as I sit here finishing this piece at the Knoxville Hampton Inn on Mother’s Day, eyeing uber-fit cyclists in a race, huffing past the window before me, I see myself clearly as “on the wrong side of the glass.” Done with allowing myself the luxury of greed, done with allowing myself to sit out the race of life, done with growing fat and lazy both in my spirit and my body, I’m making a little commitment to myself for the rest of 2010:

I choose to volunteer more of my off-time rather than hoarding it for my own “relaxation.”
I choose to live more lean, buying only what I really need and no more.
I choose to give more liberally to my children; they don’t ask for much, but I know there are things they’d love to have.
I choose to challenge myself rather than sit and wonder what challenges others.
I choose to eat smaller portions, less fat and sugar, and snack on fruit rather than expensive bad-for-me snacks.
I choose to drink more water and buy less latte, chai, beer and wine.
I choose to budget my monthly grocery expenditures, and make more on meals for those in need at my church.
I choose to use the art paper, canvases and paints I have at home before buying any new art supplies.
I choose to transform my morning “quiet time” into a walking (or running) prayer. I’ll spend more time praying for the need of others than asking God to talk to me about my own life.

I hope this speaks to you in some way, and encourages you on your path. Whatever you have or don’t have, whatever you need, whatever you have to share with others, may you be inspired in the aftermath. I feel sure that the more we all give of ourselves, the better off we'll all be. Share

What's your favorite piece of etiquette advice?Etiquette goddess Elizabeth Post has died. We must go it alone now. http://ow.ly/1E9I9 Share

Swap Your Life?! One Big Leap or Small Changes?

Not living the life of your dreams- yet? You know you're not alone. But here's more evidence: If necessity is the mother of invention, here's proof that many, many other people walking this planet are unsatisfied with their lives and willing to do something about it: http://www.swapyourshop.com/.
Swap Your Shop allows registrants to immerse themselves in other cultures and creative work environments while keeping their current job. You literally swap office spaces, even cities or states, and perform your job with someone else's window on the world. Sounds cool, huh?!
These are short-term swaps which, not unlike mini-vacations, may just inspire and revive your senses and creativity enough to return you back to your "norm" with a completely new outlook on your job, life and relationships. Expecting too much? Perhaps, but take a moment to reflect on an escape, big or small, that you took from your daily grind. A pair of fresh eyes is a valuable tool in making small changes that lead to bigger changes. Is change enticing to you? Or are you truly satisfied with your status quo? Now is a good time to ponder that.
OK, so if your answer is "No, I'm not satisfied with my life," but you're skeptical of taking a leap like SwapYourShop offers, consider some smaller action steps that may leave you a bit closer to the life of your dreams.

1. Clarify the life of your dreams. Make a list of where you'd like to live and work, with whom you'd like to live and work, and, most importantly, the one most important thing you want to do before you leave this world.
2. If your answer to #1 is written in vague generalities, take your lunch break or a whole day to hone in on the details.
3. Choose just one thing you can change reasonably and make a plan. For example, change your work hours or take a community class on something you're passionate about. Your plan includes: a. A realistic timeline b.Tangible action steps c. A person who can support you in making this change
4. Post your "plan" where you will see it every day, for example your mirror or computer monitor, including your timeline ("By June 1, I will register for scuba diving at the YMCA")
5. Tell people close to you about your one small change, and that this is part of living the life of your dreams. You will garner invaluable support and inspire them as well.
6. Applaud yourself when you've made the change! Anyone who can make small changes can make bigger ones over time.

Now get out there and enjoy your life!
Cheers! Share

Still not living the life of your dreams? Proof there are many like you: http://ping.fm/jjD1U Share

Today feels as full of positive opportunity as a big, juicy blackberry feels full of juice when nimble fingers pluck it off the summer vine. Share

HAPPY GIRL, HAPPY FRIDAY. Share

Is hope dangerous or inspiring?Contemporary thougth says its unhealthy; I disagree. Please respond! Share

Had an epiphany lately? Care to share? Share

It's my Friday! To Dale Hollow Lake, KY tomorrow for kayaking, camping, biking, hiking fun w/ daughter and friends! Share

Do you want to write? What's stopping you?! Non-Fiction Writers' Meetup last night was inspiring. Join us May 10 http://ow.ly/1xQwH ! Share

Do you Ping.fm? Just signed on& reading posting tips. Share

What Makes a Good Day?

Softly pelting rain on my face shield takes me back to a moment on a warm rainy day on Sheri Drive in Huntsville, Alabama.

I must’ve been no older than 6. The soft Winnie-Ther-Pooh wellies sloshing me down the street to my best friend’s house felt identical to the ones nestled on my scooter runnerboard, tucked around my bright red work satchel. I am forty-three, but I am six.

The rain drops on my clear vinyl Winnie-Ther-Pooh umbrella made a sound now so familiar as they made rivulets not unlike those tracking my helmet shield today, working with the fog on the reverse side to cloud my view. And yet I feel as though I see more clearly in this moment. I feel free.

Even as my knees are sopping with rainwater, and the cold chill traces up my legs, even as mud streams beneath my wellies, even as I have somewhere to be, I am going on my own terms. Time stands still as I inhale the fresh rain scent and perk my ears for every traffic sound. My knees are cold, my arms warm under the waterproof coat, and I am happy that I feel and move and choose. It is a good day. Share

Mr. Tucci- Just in Time for Valentine's Day

I’m in love.
With Stanley Tucci.
It happened just this morning.

What other man of petite stature could look so good, act so well, and speak to a foodie girl’s heart with such panache?

I’ve never seen the film Big Night (co-written and co-produced by this lovely man), but I am certain that, with a name like Secondo and a big Italian family restaurant at his fingertips, Tucci would’ve gripped me in ’96 as firmly as he did as the adorable Paul Child in the recent foodie film Julie and Julia.

But forget all that. Forget the silver screen. Forget Julia Child (apologies). Tucci is so enamored with the food culture of his Italian upbringing- and the paella and potato croquettes in his parents’ kitchen- he seems to see life through the ties that bind people: the love of food. And this makes me swoon. Who needs a heart-shaped box of chocolate?

Arising from his more recent film work as amorous and accommodating husband to food goddess Julia Child is his relationship to Chef Gianni Scappin and a cookbook celebrating his own mother’s cooking prowess. A man who loves his mom enough to celebrate her through a book collaboration must be a man with a sensitive soul and a soft heart. Lead me, Mr. Tucci, into your butler’s pantry and I will most willingly go!

But there is more. As my eyes fall this morning on the smattering of responses by Mr. Tucci (which rolls off the tongue as a lover’s nickname) in my February issue of Bon Appetit (p 110), I see phrases like “Goat cheese, olives and good white wine.” “I had a pizza oven built last year.” And: “I…stuff the branzino with herbs and put it in a big steel pan I got in Paris….” A moment please, to recover myself.
A man who talks of steel knives, heavy enamel cast-iron pots and Paris in one breath has my immediate attention. Give him warm brown eyes and a sly smile, I’m standing. But hear him say “I think about this mushroom tart at Le Gorille Blane in Paris...” and I’m running into his arms, flinging aside any poor woman who happens to be in the way.

Mr. Tucci, je t’adore. And I’ll be happy to share that midnight snack of peanut butter, banana, and honey on Italian bread any time you like. Share